And then sometimes i come to a stand-still. On the celebration of Christ King we are reminded of the history of humanity, ruled by the most powerful with a heavy, merciless hand and laws based on one man's whim. The True king shows us otherwise. If we truly call Christ our Lord, then like him we will feed the hungry, give water to those that thirst, clothe the naked, visit the sick and imprisoned, essentially be there for those in need of comfort and aid. Love.
Am i present for those who are in need of comfort and aid? There are degrees, i tell myself. Paying taxes, voting for social systems, perhaps even dropping a coin in a beggar's hat or taking on a new career that involves less profit and more human aid. Is that enough? Giving up some free time to volunteer, praying, meditating, attending mass more often, curbing vice so as to limit sin, being mindful of thoughts and speech and actions, these actions might help us grow, but is that enough? The poor woman who offers her two coins has offered more than all the rest, says Jesus, because from her poverty she has offered her whole livelihood. I go to bed at night knowing that millions starve, millions sleep exposed to the elements, the ill and dying go unattended, violence escalates, and then i wake up the next morning to start my day anew.
There is an insanity to it all. And fear roots me to my safe patterns of life, unwilling to rock the boat too much. Am i afraid? Am i willing to give up my life to dedicate my Self to another's life? Am i willing to follow the king Christ and not the commands of earthly kings bent on maintaining their own power, wealth, status and lineage? Letting go of the Self is the hardest thing: ego, that built-in tool of separation, individuality, pride and utter selfishness (the Self being the centre of the universe). Ignoring the fear it uses for self-preservation seems mad. Almost all saints and holy men i can think of have just let go and trusted enough in Christ to forge a new world that cares.
These days before Advent humble me. Indeed, they scare me a bit. There is discomfort and conflicts of interest between my ego and the Holy Ghost. "Are you crazy!? You have to take care of yourself!" says the one. The other says, "Let go. Trust me. I will always be there for you." I can choose to ignore these feelings and loose myself in Me, my life, my routines, in me, me, me. But that is not what a humble servant of one's lord is expected to do. It is my choice and i know i don't want to choose fear: get behind me Satan!
Oremus:
I pray for the hungry, thirsty, naked, ill and imprisoned, that they not be judged, but be attended to by loving hands and loving minds filled with the grace and wisdom of men and women who put their own needs last and who trust enough in the Holy Ghost to know that the Lord puts their needs first. I pray too, that i may join their ranks in service to Christ King. Amen
Deo gratias.
Am i present for those who are in need of comfort and aid? There are degrees, i tell myself. Paying taxes, voting for social systems, perhaps even dropping a coin in a beggar's hat or taking on a new career that involves less profit and more human aid. Is that enough? Giving up some free time to volunteer, praying, meditating, attending mass more often, curbing vice so as to limit sin, being mindful of thoughts and speech and actions, these actions might help us grow, but is that enough? The poor woman who offers her two coins has offered more than all the rest, says Jesus, because from her poverty she has offered her whole livelihood. I go to bed at night knowing that millions starve, millions sleep exposed to the elements, the ill and dying go unattended, violence escalates, and then i wake up the next morning to start my day anew.
There is an insanity to it all. And fear roots me to my safe patterns of life, unwilling to rock the boat too much. Am i afraid? Am i willing to give up my life to dedicate my Self to another's life? Am i willing to follow the king Christ and not the commands of earthly kings bent on maintaining their own power, wealth, status and lineage? Letting go of the Self is the hardest thing: ego, that built-in tool of separation, individuality, pride and utter selfishness (the Self being the centre of the universe). Ignoring the fear it uses for self-preservation seems mad. Almost all saints and holy men i can think of have just let go and trusted enough in Christ to forge a new world that cares.
These days before Advent humble me. Indeed, they scare me a bit. There is discomfort and conflicts of interest between my ego and the Holy Ghost. "Are you crazy!? You have to take care of yourself!" says the one. The other says, "Let go. Trust me. I will always be there for you." I can choose to ignore these feelings and loose myself in Me, my life, my routines, in me, me, me. But that is not what a humble servant of one's lord is expected to do. It is my choice and i know i don't want to choose fear: get behind me Satan!
Oremus:
I pray for the hungry, thirsty, naked, ill and imprisoned, that they not be judged, but be attended to by loving hands and loving minds filled with the grace and wisdom of men and women who put their own needs last and who trust enough in the Holy Ghost to know that the Lord puts their needs first. I pray too, that i may join their ranks in service to Christ King. Amen
Deo gratias.
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